Nudity is Sacred

Painting by Elaine Kantar Williams 

Dear Sanda,

Before I start running my mouth on this issue, I want to believe you are doing well. Each one of us comes from different homes, and obviously our lives will never be the same, judging from the different upbringing and the different environments we find ourselves.

The topic that has caught my attention is about Nudity. Nudity can be explained as a state of not wearing a dress. What is called nudity varies from cultures, each culture is different from the other, but as Africans or Ghanaians, we have great reverence for our nudeness, nudity is sacred and so therefore the notion of protecting it.

African women in general are a group that have so much respect for their nudity and do not expose it so often, except when they are with their husbands, when they are in labour, or are about taking their bath.

Having that at the back of my mind, I pray all those who read this piece will not find faults in my complaints but give the issue a very critical look and advice themselves as women and men alike. We might have sisters who might have being culprits, or it is our daughters doing it.

I was speaking to a colleague on campus who was completely against sharing nude pictures of any kind, he said, even if the individual is your husband and you have kids with him, it’s just not right to share nude picture, adding that what will happen if the phone gets stolen?

My friend traveled to the Middle East not long ago, and the first batch of complaints he had about his roommates was that the young man was receiving nude pictures and videos of his girlfriend from Ghana, yes you read it right. Some of our sisters send nude videos and pictures of themselves to their boyfriends because they have being promised marriage or something else; I have no idea, probably money.

The young man indeed complained, probably he got to see the pictures and videos too, but being the responsible man that he was, he did not encourage his friend to show the young lady’s picture amid their circle of friends.

Indeed as young women and men, our desires and prayers is to get married to good men or women who will take care of us, and together create a very strong bond and start producing our own children. That is almost every average girl’s dreams-- to be successful and finally end up with a responsible man.

I believe entirely, that any man who really loves you and wants to make you his wife will not demand sex from you because after everything, you will finally become his wife, so no need to rush into getting into your panties, vis-à-vis, any man who demands you to send him nude videos or pictures of you does not have the best interest of you at heart.

Far from that, what assurance do you have that he will see the video or pictures alone? Or even if he does watch them alone, what assurance will you have that his friends will not try to steal the phone just to have a look at your pictures.

More often than not, each of us date a man and we believe that our future and fortunes are with them and so therefore we will do everything to make that relationship work, as my friend will tell you, even on the day of the marriage ceremony, the marriage can be called off and you guys may never even reach that process of being called husband to be or wife to be, than to be called husband and wife.

What next, he might have already seen your nudeness and will go ahead to marry the supposed “good girl” or will even tell you that his mother has given him a wife and there is nothing he can do.

Will that video or picture you sent him still be in safe hands? What is the assurance that the next friend who sees it will not upload it to YouTube? Or put the pictures on photo bucket? Or even Instagram.

We are not perfect and might have made many mistakes, we would wish to correct, but that is why we humans and always ask God to forgive us our sins, as we forgive those who sin against us.

My friend just didn't understand why a beautiful young woman with a great future may behave in that fashion, but I want to believe and understand that it was a sphere of a moment decision which will not repeat itself no matter the situation.

And to these young men who demand nude videos of our sisters, you should not forget that you have sisters, and somewhere in the near future will be fathering daughters; will you be okay to see your daughters or sister sharing their nude pictures with some random guy who has promised them the heavens and the earth?

A heaven and earth which he is most likely to draw the carpet from under their feet or keep his word without trusting her?

I plead with my sisters that a good man who loves you dearly will not need your nudity for anything because he knows in the long run, you will be his wife.

As I stated in my earlier comments, we are all humans and might have done lots of mistakes in the last few years. Does it mean we won’t get our maker’s forgiveness, of course we will when we return to him with repentance and submission, but not to repeat the same mistakes again.

I will end by remembering our brothers that you might think she is a cheap girl who you have at your disposal and can have at your beck and call. Just remember that certain things are mysterious, God is watching you, you may not have sisters today, but you will have daughters in the future.

Just before I go, did any of you read the news making rounds that a young man had placed nude pictures of his girlfriend on Facebook because she broke up with him? That is just by the way, do enjoy your day.

God bless our homeland Ghana and make our men and women more responsible towards each other.
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